Normal Sized People Beware

elf

noun, plural elves

1. (in folklore) one of a class of preternatural beings, especially from mountainous regions, with magical powers, given to capricious and often mischievous interference in human affairs, and usually imagined to be a diminutive being in human form; sprite; fairy.

2. a diminutive person, especially a child.

3. a mischievous person

Not this kind


Not this one either

But more like the ones in Fern Gully

or Lord of the Rings.

She is a pixie or a fairy...
We call her an elf.Kaleigh

She only weighed 5 pounds when she was born
She only weighs 15 pounds now
She's only 6 inches taller than she was on her first day of life

She is, by far, my most easy going child. She has been, by far, my easiest child to raise. She is sweet and loving and obedient. She flits around our house entertaining herself in the most magical ways. And for the most part, is a joy to be around.

But when she gets angry... you should just run for your life. Without warning she flies into some sort of uncontrollable elfin' rage and hones in on the first object she sees and immediately and violently uses some summoned up, mythical force to
cast a spell on it. No object living or non living is spared the wrath. Poor, sad items like the plant in the corner, the couch, her sister, me, several of her toys and home decor things that are low or swing. It's displaced anger because the person or thing that she attacks is not the person or thing that upset her. She just turns to the nearest victim and unleashes her powers on them.

She begins by screaming indiscernible gibberish at you, words that can only be understood by people in the supernatural world and she lunges both hands with all ten fingers extended over and over, repeating the mystical phrases mixed in with grunts and growls. And the next thing you know, you've developed a staph infection or the plague.

And heaven forbid she gets a hold of you because she then latches on to you with an enchanted death grip. And the pain is unbearable and you ignorantly make that assumption that because you are 100 times her size, you can simply release her, but you are so wrong, my friend. You just have to sit there and endure it, until she decides the tirade is over.
And then she grits all eight of her miniature teeth at you, eyes bulging out of her head. And she protrudes her jaw like she has a severe underbite or rather that she is an angry bulldog. Unpredictable. Ready to pounce. Quite possibly drooling.

The whole episode lasts a total of 30 seconds, but it seems like a lifetime and as quickly as it came on... it's gone and she is back to her laid back self, all smiley, like nothing even happened. And you can't punish her because you are wetting your pants, you are laughing so hard. And never at any time did she stop being cute.

She is an angry elf.
But what else would you expect from an itsy bitsy, teenie, weenie
who went from the spoiled baby of the family to the forgotten middle child
in the twinkling of an eye.
I suppose I'd have some pent up emotions too.

It's hard being little
Unless you have the whole dad gum Enchanted Forest on your side
I think this wisp of a girl could literally move a mountain if she felt compelled to.
No tellin' what she'll do